Monday, February 17, 2014

ESSENCE Countdown: Taking the Plunge

Photo Courtesy of Andrea Westmoreland
Hello, everyone! My debut novel ESSENCE's launch date is creeping ever closer: t-minus three months, two weeks and counting... Yipes!

In the flurry of everything that has been happening lately, I find myself being pulled backward and forward at the same time. I often think about my childhood self--that wiry, bow-legged five year-old who proudly decided she was going to be an author before she even learned how to read. I also think about my thirty-two year-old self--the present-day me who seems collected and controlled on the outside, but who is absolutely SPINNING OUT at the realization that my original life's dream is looming just on the horizon.

What if I fail?

What if everybody in the entire universe hates ESSENCE?

What if I'm incapable of becoming the person my five year-old self so confidently believed I would be?

These are scary thoughts, and they have been rattling around in my head ever since my amazing agent Hannah Bowman sold ESSENCE to Amanda Rutter and the crew at Strange Chemistry Books last summer. Here are a few more:

What if I'm a fraud?

What if I can't do this?

What if I let everyone down?

But you know... I'm beginning to realize that sometimes, you just have to take a leap of faith. I poured my heart and my soul and my guts into ESSENCE--more-so than I did with any other book I've ever written. And I had a blast writing it--so much so that I would miss an entire night's sleep sometimes. I've never felt so possessed by a story before, and I've never let a book write itself the way I let this book write itself.

And you know what else? I'm sure some people are going to hate it. That's the truth of our reality, and there's nothing I can do to change it. So... Why worry? People will buy it or they won't; they will like it or they won't.

At the end of the day, that doesn't change the fact that I did this. I chased this dream and pinned it down before it could slip away. I decided I would regret holding back more than I would regret failing spectacularly.

So... Here goes. Time to take the plunge.


Rachna Chhabria said...

Hi Lisa Ann, nice to meet you. I know you must be excited, anxious and jittery about your book Essence's release. And all the doubts you have are just a part and parcel of a writer's life. Looking forward to reading Essence.

Dumba said...

Dear Lisa Ann

"Hate!?", "YOU!?" or something you did produce with all your heart blood!? . . . Never ever! . . . May be, one or another won't find what she/he did possibly expect to find/read in your book but that won't be your fault! . . . .
Keep up the positive spirits,keep looking forward to "the/YOUR special moment", keep trusting in yourself - That's already SOMETHING, it's even a lot!

Hugs from Dumba

Joe Slonaker said...

Dearest Lisa,

I have only known you for maybe a year or so, and that is only because of Twitter and the occasional comments you so graciously post on my Blog. That being said, I feel like you have a great strength that can't be measured. Something that only a small percentage possess. Your will is strong, and your heart, stronger.

I envy and admire you at the same time. Your dream is only starting to unfold. Even with what little I know of you, I'm very proud to be able to converse with you on occasion, and more proud to see your dream coming true.

Wishing you all the success in the world!!!!

Side note: 32, huh? Maybe that is my lucky age, too! Although, I only have about 6 months left of that age!!

Again, wishing you all the best!

LisaAnn said...

Rachna, thanks so much for stopping by. I really appreciate your kind words!

Dumba, you always brighten my day. Always. :)

Joe, thank you SO much for taking the time to respond. I appreciate it more than you know.

Altha Fidia Oktora said...

Banned complain !! Complaining only causes life and mind become more severe. Enjoy the rhythm of the problems faced. No matter ga life, not a problem not learn, so enjoy it :)

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